+Im shitting next to you+
5:31 p.m. - 2003-12-19

I woke up an hour and a half ago....Im about to go out with Paul so he can test drive my car and then go X-mas shopping....

Something feels odd.

I dont really think it has hit me that im in this wonderful relationship. Like its never happened to me this way. We do everything that couples do. Its never been this way before, and i love him. Whoa.

Last night fucking rocked. I havent laughed like that...well since the last time me and Amanda hung out...which was like that...the other day..haha...shes the only one that fully gets me...and shes the best friend a girl could have..you all are missing out.

I feel like the worst friend in the world right now tho, I should have seen something. She knows when things bother me...and i had no idea anything was really really wrong. I assume that if someone does not have a family like mine then their family is like the frewaking Brady Bunch. I totally looked passed this. I feel like a shitty ass friend. I should have seen something...i am so so sorry...please dont hate me for not knowing.

....i have eaten to much brownies....

gag

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I believe in love, in arguing, in jamming out by yourself in the car. I believe in smiling till your cheeks hurt and laughing until you cry. I believe in having someone tell you you're beautiful, dancing in the rain, and miracles. I believe in second chances, even if you've completely screwed up. I understand that everything happens for a reason, and I embrace it. I respect those who treat me right, and ignore the ones who don't. I dress the way I want to, and say what is on my mind... if you have a problem with that, then don't talk to me.

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