Everythings Broken
1:54 p.m. - 2003-07-18
Everythings Broken
1:54 p.m. - 2003-07-18
God im so hungover right now.
Yesterday was a blur...as usual.
I should have taken it as a sign that drinking wasnt a good idea, but no...
The night started out good.
I told myself I wasnt going to get drunk, i wasnt in the mood.
Holly is awesome-didnt think i was gonna like her...but shes awesome. Me and her had alot of fun...we were talking...thats when i had most of my shots.
I had 13 shots of Tequila, a mind eraser, screaming orgasm...and whatever mike gave me. I know i had 13 shots of Tequila because when i helped Holly clean up this morning i counted all the lime slices in my cup...i counted 13...blah. Well ill explain why i drank so much in a sec. I Uked...Yep... i have never drank so much to where I could not keep it down that night. I remember that they put me in the shower...and put my head in the sink. Then I went to lie down...threw up again this time in a bag, not on myself. Jesus...well me and Mike had a very good convo last night.. hes a real cool guy. Last night was one big convo fest...everyone was all hush hush about stupid shit that everyone found out about in the long run...it was stupid. (how is it that i can remember some stuff when im beyond trashed...but not the other times?)
I dunno...maybe i shouldnt even say this...but im so hungover right now i could give a fuck.
The fact that he is with someone else... i could care less about...honestly...but when he looked me in the eyes and said that im "too late" that was heartless...lol and thats when i got plastered. lol i remember talking to Holly about the situation and whatever else was coming out of my mouth, and then i ran outside to yell at Mike...because he was the one who told me to talk...blah...
I feel weird about it though. See this is what i fucking mean. I dont know how i feel about him...but after what he said to me at Toms house it sunk in..i dunno why...but it did. every time there is something with me and a guy, and i let him go...i always want to bring him back...then i get hurt again. So whatever i dont want to hear that he isnt like all the other guys..because ya know what they are all the same...to me anyway...they always hurt me...poor Kim she wanted to talk to me because she thought i hated her, or there would be hard feelings because of her and anthony...nooo way i like her...shes cool....im fine with it all...but im still pissed...then while i was passed out on the couch he was throwing stuff at me...have a lil fucking compassion...but ya know what?
it doesnt matter...im always too late...look at Tom...(not sanchez)and Steve...i was too late for both of them...see...i have had enough...
Look at me, my depth perception must be off again
Cause this hurts deeper than I thought it did
It has not healed with time
It just shot down my spine _ You look so beautiful tonight
Remind me how you laid us down
And gently smiled before you destroyed my life
Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
Would you find it in your heart?
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
Would you find it in your heart?
To make it go away
And let me rest in pieces
Look at me, my depth perception must be off again
You got much closer than I thought you did
I'm in your reach
You held me in your hands
But could you find it in your heart?
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
Would you find it in your heart?
To make it go away
And let me rest in pieces
Ok im gonna go pass out on my bed...
The Girl
Loves
Hates
Users.Cheaters.Fakes.
Limabeans.
Politics.Spiders.
feeling:
