...[Someone wake me from my nightmare]...
12:16 a.m. - 2003-10-02

"Breathe in right away, nothing seems

To fill this place

I need this every time, take your

Lies get off my case

Some day I will find, a love that flows

Through me like this

This will fall away, this will fall away

You're getting closer, to pushing me

Off of life's little edge

Cause I'm a loser and sooner or later

You know I'll be dead

You're getting closer, you're holding the

Rope and I'm taking the fall

Cause I'm a loser, I'm a loser, yeah

This is getting cold, I can't break these

Chains that I hold

My body's growing cold, there's nothing

Left of this mind or my sould

Addiction needs a pacifier, the buzz of

This poison is taking me higher

This will fall away, this will fall away

You're getting closer, to pushing me

Off of life's little edge

Cause I'm a loser and sooner or later

You know I'll be dead

You're getting closer, you're holding the

Rope and I'm taking the fall

Cause I'm a loser, I'm a loser!

You're getting closer, to pushing me

Off of life's little edge

Cause I'm a loser and sooner or later

You know I'll be dead

You're getting closer, you're holding the

Rope and I'm taking the fall

Cause I'm a loser

You're getting closer, to pushing me

Off of life's little edge

Cause I'm a loser and sooner or later

You know I'll be dead

You're getting closer, you're holding the

Rope and I'm taking the fall

Cause I'm a loser."

I cannot begin to descirbe the pain i have in my heart. I cried infront of my Family, and Paul tonight. Everything has come to a head all at once. Im having to deal with everything at the same time, and i am way to stressed out. I have come to the realization that i owe almost 5Grand in totally paying everybody off. Im so stressed out with school and having a class everyday. Then with Paul. My life is on overload. I think my best friend hates me. In my destruction mode that i have been in for the past two weeks i think i have made her upset with me.

and for this i am sorry.

I dont know what to do with myself.

<< || >>

New
Old
Profile

Email
Aim
Notes

Design
Diaryland

Extras
My Obsession
My Rants
My Fanlistings
Myspace

The Girl

I believe in love, in arguing, in jamming out by yourself in the car. I believe in smiling till your cheeks hurt and laughing until you cry. I believe in having someone tell you you're beautiful, dancing in the rain, and miracles. I believe in second chances, even if you've completely screwed up. I understand that everything happens for a reason, and I embrace it. I respect those who treat me right, and ignore the ones who don't. I dress the way I want to, and say what is on my mind... if you have a problem with that, then don't talk to me.

Loves

Friends.Long drives.Coffee.Parliment Light 100's.Red lipstick.My hotpink flats.Funky hair.Piercings.Tattoo's. Html.

Hates

Users.Cheaters.Fakes. Limabeans. Politics.Spiders.

feeling: